Life, Death, Where From, Where To
An essay by Sam Goodwin
Every second of every day an uncountable multitude of particles of water are lifted out of the continuous water-mass that makes up the oceans of the world, and started on a journey that may last a few minutes or thousands of years, and will eventually bring them all back to the same water mass out of which they came.
I believe that my journey through life is parallel to this journey of one particle of water.
The water particles are assembled into drops or droplets of moisture, haze, fog, mist, rain, snow, sleet or hail. These units may be assembled into clouds, storms, brooks, rivers, lakes, or into glaciers, and glaciers into icebergs.
Whatever the exact route, however many detours it includes, however long or short the trip, the destination is always the same—back where it started as a part of the great water-mass we call the oceans.
But how is this parallel to my journey through life—and yours?
I believe that contemporary science would accept my definition of matter as "quanta of energy organized in certain characteristic ways." I believe that the inexplicable ability of humans to experience sensations—"awareness" or "consciousness"—to think and reason—"intelligence"—and to feel emotions—love, hate, fear, pride and humiliation, etc.—are also "quanta of energy organized in certain characteristic ways."
Since the biggest and most complex organization of energy—and matter—is the universe itself, which seems to be endless in space and time, then the universe itself must certainly possess consciousness, intelligence, and emotion.
If this universe was created by a "God," then that "God" would have to be at least as great and as complex as the universe. Since the universe seems to be infinite, then the same infinite space would have to be simultaneously occupied by the universe and its creator.
I lean to a much simpler concept—that the universe is God, its own creator, and that God, the creator, is the universe.
Now, just as my body is created and nourished from matter taken out of the earth, air and water around me, assembling in a particularly characteristic way, and powered by the heat and light of the sun, so, I believe, are my consciousness, intelligence, and emotion—my entire psyche—created out of the energy of the universe assembled in a particularly characteristic way.
And just as my body returns to the earth, air and water, so, I believe, do my conciousness, intelligence and emotion return to the energy-mass, consciousness-mass and emotion-mass of the creator.
When I go to sleep for the last time, will my life, my consciousness, intellience and emotions come to an end? As an individual—yes. As a part of the great energy-mass that is the universe—no.
MY DEATH WILL BE A STEP IN THE LONG JOURNEY BACK HOME.
The fear of death is neither rational, irrational, nor anti-rational. It is something we inherit from our ancestors. Those who do not have it usually do not live long enough to become an ancestor.
I do not fear the plunge into the unknown called death. Ah, but I do dread the painful and undignified experiences that nature will probably deal me before opening that door. I hope my life will be long. There are so many things that I want to do. But if my life is short, it is just as well for the universe—of which I am a part.
I hope that life on earth will go on for many more millenia. It is present in so many incredibly beautiful forms. But if the greed and folly of people in powerful positions destroys all life on earth, life in other parts of the universe will go on.
I would not want to live forever as an individual. Forever would not be long enough to prepare for forever. The energy-mass of the universe—the psychic-mass of the universe—has to deal with forever, and since I am a part of that energy/psychic-mass, may fate give me the strength and patience to accept my role in the universe with grace and dignity.